Panic At The Disco

By now you all know that I have a slightly unhealthy obsession with my DVR.  Without it, I wouldn't be able to watch the hilarity that is Real Housewives or manage to swallow everything Michael Scott produces on The Office.  That's what she said.

Remember when I emailed DirecTV because the DVR was PMSing and demanding ice cream and footrubs all the time?

Apparently the cable I thought didn't need to be connected, did.  Problem solved.

BUT about a week ago the DVR lost all will to live.

It perished while Alexa was watching TV which prompted a meltdown from her and a 'what in the H did you do to it?' from me.

After we kissed and made up (Alexa and I, not the DVR and I - I know how things can get confusing around here) I set forth with the task of fixing the broken DVR.

Push power
Push power
Push power
Swear at it
Push the sacred red reset button
...
Push the GD red reset button
...
Try to contain my frustration and forcefully yet gently push the everspiteful red reset button
...
Channel my inner Homer and strangle the DVR while saying 'WHY YOU LITTLE'
Unplug and replug everything in
Take out the little card dealy
Blow in it
Reinsert card and push reset
MOTHERFUCKER(*&q@#*Z.,M)(80935lmgoieurt0

Last night I finally got around to calling them.  I know.

I finally got tired of listening to Josh whine about not being able to watch Miss Kitty in the other room while we watched Blue's Clues.  Father of the year.

I dreaded this call because I HATE talking to machines.  Josh was furrowing his brow and giving me the side-eye while I was yelling operator! operator! and pushing 0 over and over again.  It worked.

I was connected with a real live breathing person named John who made me redo everything I had already done and just couldn't believe the lights weren't turning on, no John still no lights and sure I'll hold while you try to find me the best deal on a new receiver.

Sooooo.  I've been having mini heart attacks and getting poop cramps for the past weekish because I'VE LOST ALL MY RECORDED SHOWS!  SOB!

Can't you see I'm in mourning over here people?

I bet a new camera and wood floors for my kitchen would make me feel better.  Just sayin'.