You know how I've been bitching about gaining all this weight and, 'oh hello love handles and size skinny work pants that all of a sudden are real asshats and don't fit anymore.'
Well apparently I've had enough of all this fatty nonsense because the other weekend I proclaimed to myself that I was getting back on the skinny bandwagon. Then something greasy and delicious happened that week so the next weekend I again proclaimed to myself that I was getting back on the skinny bandwagon. Lather, rinse, repeat for a few weeks and here we are.
I've seen rumblings about My Fitness Pal around The Twitter and such but since I'm a lazy asshole I thought to myself, Self: You don't need that calorie counting exercise wielding website to keep on track with your weight, you practice portion control and are so full of the awesome you will just magically stay skinny like this forever and ever amen.
Jump to 10 pounds later as I'm crying into my cheeseballs I see a blog post about myfitnesspal and it sparks my interest.
Time to stop *thinking* about losing weight and actually *doing* something about it.
Step one-Create an account. CHECK
Step two-Type in food consumed for the day.
Step three-Immediately flip the finger to My Fitness Pal because according to this I only get to consume 470 more calories for the day.
Step four-Start looking up favorite foods/drinks to determine their assholeness.
Step four A-ONE slice of sausage and pepperoni Pizza Hut pizza = 400 calories. Fuck you.
Step four B-ONE serving of spaghetti = 600+ calories. Double fuck you. (Also, that doesn't take in to account that a bottle of wine and two slices of garlic toast are also consumed during said spaghetti marathon....shit)
Step four C-On the menu tonight? KFC. Did you know that one fucking biscuit contains 180 calories?!
Step five-Start to reconsider this whole "lifestyle change"
I'll keep you posted.
I intend to start exercising soon.
Stop laughing.
I have decided to post this statement EVERYWHERE around my home (like especially on the fridge and where the chips are):
ReplyDelete"NOTHING TASTES AS GOOD AS SKINNY FEELS" -
Right? Cuz it's sooooo true. Skinny feels so much damn better than anything tastes. But skinny takes time and work, and food is instant gratification.
I have yet to post it ... but I'm thinking I seriously might do it... Kind of like a "Hey fat fuck, don't EEEEEEAT... Mooooooooooooooo" nicely :)
I really did keep track of what I ate long ago and far away.....it worked! It didn't last long (for me), but it worked!
ReplyDeleteAlthough, I'm with you, I'd rather go for a walk and burn a couple hundred calories and then eat/drink enough to make that up!
Good luck! BTW - I think you're perfect the way you are :)
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ReplyDeleteI know you've seen me post about it like 5000 times on the blog but seriously, Jillian Michaels DVD's are bomb dot com. 30 Day Shred and Ripped in 30...each workout is around 25 minutes counting warm up and cool down. Everyone has 25 minutes a day, you just have to prioritize your time...like waiting until the weekend to watch your DVR like me.
ReplyDeleteI've seen the results of doing it right around 5 times a week. Then you don't have to cry over a food log and feel like a failure. I still drink Mt Dew and have seen results.
This is why I run. Spaghetti, pizza, and chicken (and alcohol) are just too good to avoid!
ReplyDeleteChels - Love the quote!